Thursday, April 15, 2010
behold. the person i miss the most-est. :)
i almost never blog-hop. in fact, i dare to say that i only blog-hop once a year. the reason being i get all emotional when i read a blog. be it excitement or nostalgia or plain jealousy depression, i never leave someone else's blog without a strong emotion.
they call it empathy?
lately i have really been thinking. what am i going to do with my life? if i had the choice, would i have gone to form 6 or college? i've always thought college grass looked so green. yet, sometimes i kinda appreciate the chance to go back to safety in form 6.
not to say i'm scared of challenges. i actually do like them in fact. :)
i would like to change myself.
change my bad habits. change my childish behaviour. change my often-times negative outlook on life. change my bad-first-impression perspective of people. change my imperfect looks.
wishes do come true sometimes?
yesterday night i cried out to Him. i cannot do this alone.
i cannot walk this earth without divine Strength to keep me from tripping on seemingly flat ground full of rocky temptations.
i cannot face people i love with all my heart and hold relationships without perfect Love to bind it all together.
i cannot attempt to undergo a task without heavenly Wisdom and Direction to pull me through the blur in my head.
[16th March 2010]
He told me i would be stretched like homemade noodles. pulled in many different directions, coming out as multiple strands of my former self. i understood immediately what He was referring to and knowing i would have plenty of opposition. but He said it was only for a season of my life.
right now i am the president of my school's christian fellowship. i am the secretary in my sports' house. i am one of the vice-presidents of the co-curricular prefects board. i am the set designer for the play my school is organising in july. my average school hours are from 7.30 a.m. to 4 p.m. daily. i have extra math classes on mondays and tuesdays. drama practice on mondays. karate trainings on wednesdays. piano classes on thursdays. cf on fridays. if i'm not studying in class, i am designing props, planning for cf or running an errand for my house captain.
i also lead a cell group every friday night. train singers in jyb on saturday mornings. play floorball in the afternoon and serve in youth meetings at night. i go to church on sunday mornings and play captain ball in the afternoons.
if thats not being pulled, i don't know what is.
wave challenge captain ball is already over.
muet exam is next week, as is my final grade piano exam.
division II matches end in 3 weeks.
my positions in school will be given up in roughly 2 months' time.
the play will be done in 3 months.
stpm is over in 7 months,
and me being cg leader in 8 months.
soon all that is left is my ministry in youth and weekly floorball + captain ball trainings.
i wonder what my purpose in life is. ultimately it's to worship God.
but i know for every person it is different.
how does my way go?
6:50 PM
behold. the person i miss the most-est. :)